I am Chair of Sunday Assembly Edinburgh, a chapter of the global Sunday Assembly movement brings the benefits of church-like gatherings (singing together, hearing talks and readings, reflecting on moral questions. meeting people and eating cake amongst others) to a non-religious congregation. Our assembly was on the theme of The Courage To Be Kind, and our speaker was the excellent Ben Thurman of Carnegie UK Trust, the Wellbeing charity.
Ben’s talk was based around the work Carnegie have been doing for some years now about what creates Wellbeing, and in particular how kindness between neighbours can be an important and also challenging part of helping people build and sustain strong local communities. He pointed us to their report The Place Of Kindness: Combatting loneliness and building stronger communities (free download). Even though it dates from 2017, this report is full of well-argued ideas about both the strategies and the challenges of linking small acts of kindness into a wider neighbourhood context. There are three keys identified which can help to bridge this gap:
Welcoming places: Having places which are free to use for community members, building a spirit of warm hospitality, having places which are free from agenda and not linked to a particular cause, and noting that it’s people that make places.
Informal opportunities: Making kindness visible, giving permission (and encouragement) to act in kindness, creating opportunities for connection, and making an effort to connect and act in kindness.
Values of kindness: Be kind to yourself (first), take responsibility, trust people, recognise and celebrate kindness, and notice and question values.
Those of you who have taken a look at our Village In The City Manifesto will note some key connections – the importance of places (as well as people), the focus on hospitality, the importance of inviting and trusting people.
The report is particularly interesting in that it also identifies what gets in the way of kindness: personal risk (people don’t like to feel they are putting themselves at risk in engaging with others), regulation (institutions have rules to follow, which can easily get in the way of staff acting kindly), professionalism (which tends to place dispassionate expertise over compassionate engagement) and performance management (organisations tend to measure what’s easy to measure, not what really contributes their acting in kindness).
Overall this report offers challenges to us as neighbourhood community builders. It shows how well-meaning institutions can get in the way, and how we have to work actively and tirelessly to help people to get involved and connected – even if that means taking on a bit of risk ourselves. If we won’t do that, then how can we ask others?
Please download and read the report. What are YOUR takeaway points, actions and reminders? Please do add them below!
